Alexei Panshin's The Abyss of Wonder


The Doo Wop Stomp

It started in the days of old
    When music was unknown
Rock hadn't been invented then
    All they knew was stone
They weren't even human yet
    They needed to be shown
A young shaman began to dance
    With his black cat bone

He stomped his left foot on the ground
    He followed with his right
Then he raised his voice in chant
    It echoed through the night
He pounded on a spirit drum
    He rose in magic flight
He showed them how to do the do
    They said it was all right

They left their caves to join the dance
    They gathered in a ring
They brought along a covered dish
    Whatever they could bring
They sang a song in harmony
    It was a brand new thing
They Stomped until the morning light
    They made the shaman king

The Stomp put thoughts into their heads
    It gave them things to do
They ceased to be monkey men
    They became like me and you
They piled up the Pyramids
    They built Stonehenge, too
They Stomped across the continents
    Looking for what's new

They do the do, they do the Doo Wop Stomp
They do the do, they do the Doo Wop Stomp
They do the do, they do the Doo Wop Stomp
Way down in the Doo Wop swamp

Old Man Noah on the Ark
    With nothin' else to do
Taught the bears to do the Stomp
    Crocogators too
They all began to do the Stomp
    The whole unlikely crew
They Stomped away for forty days
    Until the rain was through

Ulysses and the other Greeks
    Before the walls of Troy
Inside a wooden horse all day
    They didn't make a noise
Then they got pulled inside the gates
    It was a perfect ploy
They crashed the Trojan party
    And began to Stomp with joy

Prince Charming held a royal ball
    When the moon was blue
Little Red Riding Hood was there
    Sleeping Beauty too
But Cinderella topped them all
    She kicked off her shoes
She Stomped away 'til midnight
    And then said toodle-oo


The Stomp is older than the hills
    And yet it's still the news
Julius Caesar did the Stomp
    He never had the blues
Queen Victoria did the Stomp
    She said, "We are amused"
Rasputin always did the Stomp
    In his blue suede shoes

The Stomp raced across the mountains
    It lingered by the shore
It leaped across the ocean blue
    To the streets of Baltimore
Stomping is the human way
    Let out a mighty roar
We'll Stomp until we drop
    We'll Stomp forevermore


We've done the Stomp through history
    It's the human trend
Albert Einstein did the Stomp
    At parties with his friends
We'll Stomp across the galaxy
    The party never ends
We'll do the Stomp through Space and Time
    We'll Stomp 'til we transcend


-- by Josh Wachtel and Alexei Panshin



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